2000-11-21 - 986028927

On the internal soundtrack: "For What It's Worth", Buffalo Springfield.

What crappy weather we're having. My feet are always cold, including right now. I've been cranky for over a week now. Lack of sun and lack of warmth certainly aren't helping.

Poor Poindexter. He's so nice to me when I'm cranky. Gives me extra kisses and hugs and pats. I try very hard not to take it out on him. I think I manage to succeed most of the time. He just has to listen to me grumbling under my breath a lot and shrieking and cussing when I accidentally overwrite my C program with an empty file.

I'm going to try to warm up my feet by mentally imagining them being warm. I know this is possible, although I don't know about the technique. Right now I have socks on with slippers over and it's not enough, so time to put my brain to work. I'm pretending they're in a tub of very warm water. We'll see.

Tomorrow we are taking the train to NJ for Thanksgiving. It was an exorbitant amount of money but it's probably cheaper than what we would have paid to go to Florida for Thanksgiving. It should be a very nice, very relaxing trip.

This means NO SITTING IN TRAFFIC. Last year it took us five hours (compared to three without traffic) to get to NJ and I am NOT going through that again. It takes three times the usual time just to get out of the DC area, then you get stuck at toll booths in Baltimore and Delaware. It's really horrendous.

There's a New American restaurant in my hometown that has a 26 Food rating in the Zagat guide. Poindexter and I love New American, and my brother said that he REALLY wants to eat there. We might go for lunch on Friday.

Holy shit, it's actually working. My feet are getting warmer.

Poindexter, being the kind, perfect husband that he is, lets me warm my feet between his thighs before we sleep. Since my feet are usually little blocks of ice, this is an incredibly nice thing for him to do.

I'm actively visualizing this and I can feel my feet warming up. My left small toe is the warmest and other places are being stubborn, but they're coming around. That's so weird! I knew it was possible to raise your body temperature by concentrating on it, but it's still pretty weird.

I look at it this way: if I can cause a trip to the can because I'm having panicky thoughts, or if stress can make so many parts of my body hurt, then I can certainly warm up my feet with thoughts, too. I guess the hard part will be keeping them warm.

It certainly makes you wonder, though, what else you can do to heal your body with your brain. Willpower and belief have a lot to do with it -- doctors know this, and prescribe placebos all the time. I heard about some woman who chose not to undergo chemotherapy, etc. for cancer -- she said she was going to cure it by herself somehow. I certainly hope she succeeds.

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