2002-01-18 - 9:05 p.m.

On the internal soundtrack: One of the Brandenburg Concertos. In F major, I think.

So, have you ever heard about civilians buying automatic weapons? It's legal in some states, and of course you have to jump through a lot of bureaucratic hoops to get one.

Have you ever wondered, then, why on earth somebody would want one of those things? Surely they're only good for killing people, and what law-abiding gun owner living in a peacable society needs that much power in a gun?

Well, this evening I had the opportunity to use an automatic rifle -- a machine gun -- and gained some insight as to why someone might purchase such a thing.

You know why civilians buy them?

'CAUSE THEY'RE FUCKIN' FUN TO SHOOT, THAT'S WHY!!! HOLY SHIT! OH MY GOD!

The part-owner of the range we go to bought himself an automatic rifle. He actually purchased it in June, and it took six months to go through all the paperwork -- from local authorities to the ATF folks -- before he could actually have it.

This is the same guy who gave me a hair-trigger pistol with a lot of recoil to shoot, just so he could watch me jump a foot in the air. So I was extremely suspicious when he kept insisting that I try it. But he put it on semi-auto first (one round per trigger-pull) and let me feel that, and it wasn't bad. Then he put it on automatic and braced my shoulder with his hand, and ... BRRRRRRRRRRAP! BRRRRRRRRAP! GODDAMN! WOW! HOLY SHIT!!!

I just did two short bursts, nothing much. I was quite surprised at my reaction. I'm not really sure what's so fun about it. It's really easy to shoot -- not painful at all -- and there's just something awesome about all that energy and power. Or something. I'm not impressed by the usual phallic extensions -- muscle cars, what have you -- but damn, that gun was fun to shoot.

Here's Poindexter with the machine gun:

While there, I also tried a .38 revolver (S&W) for a while. It gave me blisters. It had a stiff trigger, so I had to cock it to use it effectively. After 30 rounds or so I was getting into a groove of cock, aim, shoot, cock, aim, shoot. But I think I like the semiautomatics better. If I can figure out a way to effectively and quickly un-jam Poindexter's 9mm when the cartridge gets jammed (something I have trouble with right now), then I think I can feel comfortable with a bigger-caliber semi-auto. We'll see.

After firing off some 50 rounds with the .38 and the 9mm, I went back to my little .22 pistol. It was like nothing. Like a hiccup. It cracked me up. Here's me with the Ruger:

Yesterday I complained about lack of sleep. I felt horrible yesterday. Two things:

1. Last night I went to bed, was asleep in about two seconds -- once I stopped laughing, that is -- and slept like a rock until 8:30. Then I went back to sleep until 9:20. Then 10. I feel fabulous today. I LOVE SLEEP! And flex time.

2. The reason I woke up so early yesterday and couldn't fall asleep was because of a bad dream. In my dream, the range we go to (a former bunker in a basement) that I love so much was completely gutted and renovated, and was horribly crowded with people I didn't like. Worst of all, the two guys who work there -- our main reason for patronizing this place -- had left. Laugh all you want; I was traumatized.

This, plus a couple of other dreams in which I have forgotten how to operate our firearms, was the last straw. It's been too long since we've had target practice. That's why we went tonight. It was ladies' night, too, so I get to shoot half price and get to see a few more gun-totin' chicks than usual.

The range guys had missed us, apparently. Since we hadn't been there in three months or so, they were worried we'd gotten sent off to Afghanistan or something. Apparently a lot of people they know -- this area is full of military and government folks -- have gotten sent elsewhere.

When I'm away from firearms for a while, I start to get scared of them again. It makes me crazy. So I need to go remind myself that I know how to use the things without hurting anybody (including myself). My evening at the range certainly helped with that. I was very nervous at first, and finally relaxed after shooting a few dozen rounds with each of the guns. We have to go more often from now on.

Heh, my brother and I were talking on IM the other day. He asked if we were looking at Manhattan as a possible place to move. I said not really, too hectic, and mentioned that NYC isn't very firearm-friendly, but in Philadelphia we can own handguns and get a concealed carry permit.

He said, "What do you want to carry a gun around for?"

I replied, "To shoot people, what else?"

(If you think I meant that literally, or if you don't find it even mildly amusing in a lame sort of way, go find another journaler to read. You don't belong here.)

Seriously, it's a matter of principle. I want the carry option available to me, in case I should decide that -- with some serious training -- I might be better off carrying a gun on my person. I definitely want one in the house.

Generally, I think Poindexter uses gun laws as a barometer for the political climate of an area. If they won't let him own a handgun, they'll probably make him completely insane in a lot of other ways.

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